tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1238535709924620742012-02-16T11:51:49.763-05:00BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.comBlogger381100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-36185513757744196942009-09-02T07:00:00.000-04:002009-09-02T07:00:06.122-04:00

There are some things that will jinx a budding relationship. It’s not superstitious to believe that these things will destroy your relationship. It’s a fact. A scientific fact.These are the things that will do it: 1. Program him into the speed dial on your phone. As soon as his number is assigned a speed dial key, your relationship is guaranteed to crumble. *I have a

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-795139685219744042009-08-30T07:00:00.000-04:002009-08-30T07:00:00.847-04:00

Any time you date a guy for a relatively lengthy period of time, you meet his friends. (You know, unless you are not his girlfriend). And you hang out with his friends. Some of those friends you put up with – like Gets Too Drunk at Every Social Event Guy or Good Buddy’s Pretentious (Kind of Bitchy) Wife. Those are the friends you put up with because (a) they’re his friends, and (b) you don’t

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-71710404035623861992009-08-28T07:00:00.000-04:002009-08-28T07:00:02.132-04:00

For men in their late 20’s early 30’s, it’s all about timing. When they decide they want to settle down, when they decide to get married, it’s a lot about timing.Do they put thought into it or do they just decide it’s time? Is it just because their friends are all getting married and having babies? Or is that what they really want? Or is it that that’s what they really want, and their friends

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-16705709954432524482009-08-25T07:00:00.002-04:002009-08-25T07:00:01.873-04:00

Too Old For Me Guy: He calls me and asks me out for a second date. We decide to go to dinner and a movie. Dinner is at 5. The movie is at 7. I’m anticipating that I’ll be home by 10.It’s shaping up to be a wild night already.Dinner is pleasant. Except for all his references to things that happened in the 80’s. When he was an adult, and I was in elementary school. He was in college while I

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-82391156193238482882009-08-23T20:01:00.001-04:002009-08-23T20:25:15.901-04:00

Okay, so here’s what happened. I met a guy I liked, and we started dating. And I didn’t feel like it was right to write about him because we were dating. But now we’re not. So I’m back.Rejoice.

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-29973439110010793372009-05-30T09:15:00.000-04:002009-05-30T09:15:00.295-04:00

So, after the debacle with Computer Geek Guy, Best Friend and I decided we needed a more solid game plan. Pre-planned excuses. So we spent an evening on the phone, (drunkenly) coming up with our Get-Out-Of-There excuse. Here’s what we came up with:Best Friend calls and pretends to be my roommate, who has just locked herself out of our apartment.The problems: (a) this is not a sufficiently

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-69165901009139387112009-05-29T11:27:00.001-04:002009-05-30T09:45:26.986-04:00

On The Frisky, Wendy Atterberry recently wrote an article answering guys’ questions “Why Do Women….?” One of the things guys wanted to know was, “Why are women generally so bad at meeting their male friends’ new girlfriends?” Wendy’s answer was: “Insecurity. They may not want you for themselves, but they also don’t want any other woman stealing their place in your life.” I wholly

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-40095087057134284362009-05-24T08:20:00.002-04:002009-11-27T22:29:15.059-05:00

There is a lot of dating advice out there. It’s a lucrative field. And it’s primarily aimed at women. And how we can figure out what we’re doing wrong. Or what he really means. Or what’s really going on. And how we can change our clothes, hair, make-up, moves in bed, jokes, and conversation so that we’ll have a better dating experience. Because how could it not be better, once we’ve

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-17723440533325554372009-05-23T12:26:00.000-04:002009-05-23T12:29:11.739-04:00

I have cats. Two of them. This does not make me a crazy cat lady. Two cats (or two of any other pet) is a perfectly reasonable number. The sheer fact that I own two cats is not indicative of a future living in a dilapidated, rambling old house with hundreds of cats running rampant. I talk to my cats. This also does not make me crazy. I don’t expect them to talk back. But I do interact with

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-43818900448427468032009-04-30T07:00:00.003-04:002009-05-29T20:41:08.250-04:00

Too Old For Me Guy: He’s sixteen years older than me. And he has a kid. He’s short (Seriously. Really short. I’d say maybe 5’5”. On a good day. I’m 5’1”, and with heels on, I was taller than him.). And he’s bald. We met for coffee at 4:30 in the afternoon. I was wondering if maybe I’d misunderstood, and this was actually a dinner date. He probably knows all the good early bird specials

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-75323585164869647632009-04-28T07:00:00.002-04:002009-04-28T07:00:00.496-04:00

Computer Geek Guy: After a series of great emails, Computer Geek Guy and I agree to meet for coffee. He warns me that he doesn’t look exactly like his profile picture – because he shaved his beard. He fails to mention that he weighs almost 300 pounds.He’s wearing a tight, faded black tee-shirt and camo shorts. He has on black, high-top converse shoes with white athletic socks peeking over the

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-30950120616154666942009-04-27T07:00:00.006-04:002009-04-27T01:03:33.042-04:00

Grad School Guy and I went on two dates. I thought they both went well. I had a good time, and it seemed like he did too. So I was surprised and a little disappointed when he called me and said that he didn’t think we should continue to date. He very apologetically explained that this quarter, he is teaching a class and working on his dissertation, and he hadn’t realized how busy he was going

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-5117303355283133082009-04-24T07:00:00.000-04:002009-04-24T07:00:00.526-04:00

Coming soon to a blog near you! (...um, this one).Dissed For the Dissertation: Grad School Guy cites extreme stress over his (three years from completion) dissertation as a reason he can’t continue to date me. Okay. I recognize a polite brush-off, and am fine with it. But then…he’s unusually friendly. Like, weirdly friendly…Rated MM for Mixed MessagesDinner at the MCL Cafeteria: Too Old For

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-6112538128322587462009-04-23T09:49:00.002-04:002009-04-23T09:54:35.954-04:00

The importance of being in the right state of mind before looking through online profiles cannot be overstated. Because there are so many profiles and so much information out there. It can easily overwhelm the unprepared. I have found, after countless hours perusing dating sites that being in the wrong state of mind can lead to: (1) Much lower standards. The more guys I look at online, the

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-62212102866180947142009-04-22T07:00:00.001-04:002009-04-22T07:00:00.703-04:00

Today’s post is in honor of my best friend. Best Friend lives in New York City. (She’s an Ohio girl at heart!) Being a cute, smart, bubbly, all-around-fun, late 20’s/early 30’s, NYC woman, she periodically finds herself in the position of hosting old college friends who come for a visit. Single women. Who want to come to the city and live their own personal Sex and the City episode (SatC Gals).

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-17099638188968657352009-04-21T07:00:00.004-04:002009-04-21T07:00:00.584-04:00

Grad School Guy: He’s super nerdy. But he’s sort of cute. He’s got that little 3-day scruff on his chin. He wears glasses. (Small, dark-rimmed glasses.) He’s not a big guy – he’s thin because he’s a vegetarian. Mostly for ethical reasons. You know, opposed to factory farming, pesticides, and animal cruelty. But he’s got some nice lean muscle to his body because he walks or rides his bike

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-68792146030239190802009-04-20T07:00:00.002-04:002009-04-20T22:20:54.782-04:00

Police Officer Guy: I have an email from Police Officer Guy. Who I have never had any contact with before. Apparently, this is his idea of wooing me:hey whats up? id really like to talk to u more and im a big texter so im hoping u get this and will text me ###-###-####Wow. I’m weak-kneed. I click through to look at his profile.He’s “having the hardest time finding the right girl”. But here’

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-90872742374238088672009-04-12T07:00:00.002-04:002009-04-12T07:00:00.732-04:00

Seriously. This is just funny stuff.

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-43658599741867029782009-04-11T07:00:00.001-04:002009-04-11T07:00:00.536-04:00

I recently read the following comment about online dating: "It’s kind of like going thrift shopping. You really have to search the racks to find a winner, but then it’s one of a kind." And that kind of sums it up. (Really, it sums up all dating). There is a lot of crap out there. A lot of stuff that you look at and think, “never in a million years.”Like the guys whose profiles say:“I am

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-28752629952527824642009-04-10T07:00:00.005-04:002009-04-10T07:00:00.940-04:00

People (who are not gay and have never been married) who have gotten to their late 20’s/early 30’s and are single can be identified by their relationship histories:Desperate for Love: No serious/long-term relationships. Possibly no dating experience at all. Either: (a) very sheltered and idealistic and likely to be super Christian; or (b) has serious mental and/or emotional issues that have not

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-87022629092782443632009-04-09T07:00:00.000-04:002009-04-09T07:00:00.726-04:00

I was being hip and hanging out at a local coffee shop (I was actually hoping to casually-on-purpose run into this guy I think I like), when I ran into a guy I went to high school with.We had mutual friends in high school, but weren’t friends. I could probably count on one hand the number of times I’d spoken to him. We’d never had anything that could (even generously) be described as a

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-11249516860750372862009-04-08T07:00:00.004-04:002009-11-27T22:23:37.069-05:00

It seems like every media outlet I come into contact with lately is inundating me with the “Science of Love.” Or attraction. Or dating. Or romance. Don’t scientists have some horrible disease they should be spending their time and resources curing? Why are they spending all this time and energy trying to figure out scientific explanations for the crazy shit we do when we’re dating, attracted

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-18525790298555486662009-04-07T07:00:00.002-04:002009-04-07T07:00:00.615-04:00

So we’re about 20 minutes in, and the conversation turns to online dating. (There’s a natural curiosity and desire for comparison of experience amongst the online daters.). He asks me why I am using the dating site we met through, and not eDiscord. I launch into a two-fold explanation:The first part is about how the guy who started eDiscord is a bible thumping homophobe. He doesn’t believe in

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-78100102379274409322009-04-06T07:00:00.000-04:002009-04-06T07:00:00.492-04:00

I don’t use eDiscord.* No matter how happy and smug those couples look on T.V.Because eDiscord is for people really want to get married. But they don't just want to get married. They really really really want to get married. Now. Yesterday. Marriage is the goal. It's the be-all, end-all. And they are ready to settle for someone who isn’t that bad.Soulmate? Nope. Love of your life? Nope

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-12101146779887704072009-04-05T09:45:00.001-04:002009-04-05T09:47:35.532-04:00

Online dating brings out the protector in everyone I know. Now, I’m all in favor of being safe. But it seems to me that I’ve managed to make it safely through life for quite a few years. And I’ve been in plenty of dangerous situations. If something bad is going to happen to me, it’s going to happen. Where’s the line between living life and trying to stay safe? My line is different from your

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-52196304139362764112009-04-02T10:50:00.001-04:002009-04-02T10:53:59.208-04:00

So, Really Nice Guy goes on vacation with his friends. I’m planning not to see him again when he gets back. Then I get a 3:30 a.m. phone call from him. But it’s not from him. It’s from his friend, Drunk Guy. Drunk Guy leaves me a message.A long message. A message about how much he’s heard about me. How he’s heard that me and Really Nice Guy are “together.” And he’s happy for us. And he

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-64161191838482396402009-03-31T07:00:00.000-04:002009-03-31T07:00:00.563-04:00

Use spell-check. Also use punctuation, capitalization, and proper grammar. You’re not writing a text message: use full words and complete sentences.Put up pictures of yourself. No matter how clever, intelligent, witty, or intriguing your profile is, I’m not even going to read it if you don’t show me what you look like. In more than one picture. Use recent pictures: I’m going to figure it

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-41411093080030751542009-03-30T07:00:00.001-04:002009-03-30T07:00:01.020-04:00

We’re all the Psycho Girl. We don’t want to be. But we are. That’s why we’re obsessed with getting confirmation from our friends that we’re not Psycho Girl. Because we know that girl. Because we’re her. And we hear our guy friends talk about her. We watch them deal with her. And we agree with them that she’s psycho. Because she kind of is. We recognize that she is. She’s sad and

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-31644453119736041072009-03-29T07:00:00.002-04:002009-11-27T21:46:39.841-05:00

Cute Friend Guy: I ask him to go to the movies with me. We’ve never hung out together, alone. But we’re friends. We both regularly hang out with members of the opposite sex, alone, as Just Friends. I have a crush on him, and am hoping it was more than that – but I’m not sure he is. So I figured I’d ask him to go to a movie with me (Just Friends go see movies together…it’s all about the

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-61040192580111299682009-03-28T07:00:00.001-04:002009-03-28T07:00:00.819-04:00

The tricky thing about racists (at least educated ones) is that they know how to avoid really sounding like they’re racist. He’s not going to use the N word. He’s not going to spew white power propaganda. He’s not going to promote ethnic cleansing.But he’s going to use a lot of stereotypes. He frequently references race and ethnicity as a part of the conversation. In a way that makes it

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-43693045794479990932009-03-27T07:00:00.001-04:002009-03-27T07:00:00.233-04:00

Works Third Shift Guy: Nothing good is going to come from a breakfast date. I am not a morning person. So I’m already at a disadvantage, since it’s significantly harder to be witty and charming when I’m groggy and cranky.I don’t know what to wear for a breakfast date. Other than sunglasses, because it’s really bright and sunny, and my eyes are already pretty unhappy with me since they have to

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-81037580698391314852009-03-26T07:00:00.004-04:002009-11-27T18:19:13.265-05:00

Frat Boy Lawyer guy: His profile is one of the first ones that comes up as a match for me. He’s cute. I know I’ll hate him as soon as I read his profile. You know that kind of guy you’re attracted to and drives you crazy at the same time? I can tell immediately that he’s one of those. He went to Miami (Ohio, not Florida). He’s a frat boy. He runs marathons. He’s smart. He’s witty. He’s

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-87396814658708666712009-03-25T15:10:00.004-04:002009-11-27T18:17:19.814-05:00

Really Nice Guy: He’s really nice. Too bad that really nice also means kind of boring. And kind of naïve.I need a guy with a little bit of an edge. It’s only fun for a little while that he’ll do anything I want. I mean, seriously. Have an opinion. Have a preference. Stop staring at me with those puppy dog eyes, waiting for me to tell you what we’re going to do next. You’ve got to push back, at

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-60157766730680371672009-03-24T15:01:00.002-04:002009-11-27T18:14:24.495-05:00

So, when a guy I’m not interested in emails me on the online dating site I use, the site has this handy-dandy little link I can click on: It helpfully asks if I want to “say ‘no, thanks’”? Why, yes! In fact, I do. I think it’s polite.Then, the site consoles me - “saying ‘I’m not interested’ is never easy” - and then gives me some choices – I always choose “Thanks for writing to me, but

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-44141072167140264142009-03-23T07:00:00.001-04:002009-03-23T07:00:00.720-04:00

Really Nice Guy: I suggest we meet for coffee. He is totally up for it. Even though he’s never been to a coffee shop. But that’s okay. He’ll meet me wherever I want to go. Does he want to get a drink instead? That’s fine too. Anywhere I want to go. Just tell him where to go and when to be there.He’s cuter than his pictures. (Awesome. He was cute in his pictures, so this is definitely a

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-86143987545539818152009-03-21T15:19:00.002-04:002009-03-21T15:23:02.727-04:00

I’m confused about the kissing. I like to kiss. I like to make out. And the kissing is important. If he’s not a good kisser, he’s not going to be good at anything else. It’s an essential test of chemistry. Bad kisser? That’s it for me. No point in continuing on. Game over.So, if I like him, I want to smooch a little. Maybe more than a little. But when do we kiss? I’m up for kissing on

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-10658679635986767342009-03-18T19:41:00.007-04:002009-11-27T18:06:17.846-05:00

Outdoorsy Guy: Loves mountain biking. Really loves mountain biking. Really really really loves mountain biking. Wanna hear him talk about mountain biking? Because he will.We decide to meet for drinks. I get to the bar a few minutes early and order a beer. He saunters in 20 minutes late:"I'm late."Not "I'm sorry I'm late." Not "Nice to meet you, sorry I'm late."I smile and joke, "I thought

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-123853570992462074.post-82244504095687094932009-03-12T16:22:00.004-04:002009-03-19T19:22:03.285-04:00

Great Personality Guy: Picture-wise, not too promising. But he might be cuter in person. I thought I'd give him a shot because:that's the point of this whole dating thing - meeting people I wouldn't normally meet or go out with;from his online profile, he seemed to have a great personality; andhis emails and IMs were very funny - make me laugh out loud funny - and I'm a sucker for a good sense

BitterSweetienoreply@blogger.com1